Dear, Henley June,
Today is Ash Wednesday. We Methodist love this High-Church tradition because the outward sign of the grey cross symbolizes an inward change of being claimed by Christ. One Ash Wednesday scripture from Matthew 6 speaks of praying to the Creator within a secret space (as opposed to the showy prayers of the hypocrites). This concept jumped out at me. Ever since returning from an enneagram retreat last month, I have been focused on becoming a more evolved three/performer.
As a three, I am highly social and love living in the public light. This makes secret places very foreign and even uncomfortable for me. However, I have grown to love this secret and sacred space. The Holy Spirit dwells and speaks within me. Joan Chittister once wrote that, “Everything we need for life already resides within us.” Or in the Latin, “ego sum sanctuarium meum.”-I am my own sanctuary. In this secret and sacred space, I have no need to seek approval or security from anyone. In this space, approval and standards are obsolete. From this secret and sacred space, my mind, body, and spirit are infused with energy. In this sacred and secret space, I am: held, loved, and healed by the one who made me and knows me.
Ego sum sanctuarium meum. The more time I spend in this sanctuary, the more evolved I will become as a three. The image of one as a sanctuary takes on new meanings when she is trying to get pregnant. Prayers of you in my womb (a safe & sacred space) gush out of my heart daily. Patience, patience, patience, I must remind myself to have patience. This space between efforts and results is awkward for me. As a three, I am forced to end this post on a positive note. With that said, even when I am whiny, doubtful, and impatient- God is still working for good in my life. May I be empowered by this from within throughout Lent and always.
(Originally written on March 5th, 2014)